In Memory

There are events that you hope to burn into memory.

I watched one of those moments this weekend. I was with my father-in-law when we went to pick up his mom from the nursing home with his father. Grandma doesn't remember much anymore and Grandpa lives at home alone now. It hasn't been many years since Grandpa could easily out work me stacking hay bales or Grandma would be making lemonade for us as we worked on their roof. But, not this day.

This day Grandma is sitting in a chair staring at the TV in the Alzheimers ward at the home. I don't know if she is watching or just looking. And this day I walk slowly with Grandpa as he shuffles along the hot sidewalk and then up the stairs to go visit.

Her son leans down to ask her if she wants to go with us to visit the graveyards this Memorial Day weekend. It takes a couple times for him to get Grandma to look him in the eye before she quietly says yes. As she answers, her voice sounds a lot like my daughter, her first great-grandchild. Though it is a little more timid and quiet than my daughter talks today. Grandpa scolds us a bit about going to fast and talking to much. He says that it scares her when we do that. Grandpa takes off his hat and bends down with difficulty to look her in the eye. He asks her if she recognizes him. She says yes, but also says "you look different".

Ever so slowly her son and husband get her to stand and start walking with us. It takes about twenty feet before we realize we didn't get her shoes on yet. Not a good start for walking across a hot sidewalk on a calm and sunny day. I grab a chair for her and we have Grandma sit back down so the nurse can put on her sandels for us. As we wait for the nurse to come back from her room with the sandels I get to just stand and watch.

Grandma looks over and sees Grandpas hand. He is leaning against the wall and waiting with his arm loose at his side. Shakily she reaches out and grabs his hand and pulls it to her. Holding his hand now she brings it to her lips for a gentle kiss.

I smile and look up at Grandpa. He has an amazing look on his face as he watches her and then looks to me. In his eyes and in his smile I can see true love.